Making Retirement Good for You and Your Family

So, you're retired. You may eventually get a job or volunteer at the Y, but for now you enjoy sleeping in, planning your own time, puttering around the house. This relaxation may be just what you need after years in the daily grind, but how will it affect your family?

If your spouse is already retired or has been a stay-at-home worker, your arrival might be a mixed blessing. If your spouse is in a daily routine to maintain the household and pursue other daytime activities outside the home, you presence might be disruptive - especially you are underfoot during cleaning times or if you expect changes in how your spouse spends all their time.

What if you spouse is still working? Will you take on more of the household chores so your spouse will be able to spend more time with you when they get home? If your spouse took care of the house when you were both working, they might be a bit resentful if you don't step up and take on more when you have time on your hands. What's harder is if you are very needy for both companionship and personal services, such as meal preparation. You can make them feel additional stress if you are too demanding.

When you retire, you will be bringing in less money. Will your retirement income and any savings you have be able to cover your obligations? Especially if you have kids at home that are still in high school or college, can you afford to stop working without disrupting the family lifestyle? If you find that retirement will put a crimp in your family finances, you may need to include a job in your plans sooner rather than later.

Keeping in mind that you must balance you own needs and desires to enjoy your retirement with those of your family, here are some steps you might consider to make the experience pleasant for everyone.

Talk out potential issues, beginning with your spouse's schedule.
Develop your own space, but allow your spouse to have theirs too.
Revisit the issue of who does the work to maintain the home. If you are a Baby Boomer, you may already have less firm beliefs about what is "men's work" vs. "women's work." It only makes sense that you take on more duties if you have more time.
If you are a very dependent person, be a late bloomer and develop some independence to relieve your spouse of pressure to feed, entertain, and maintain you.
Your retirement can be great for you and your family. Like everything else that involves change, planning will help with the retirement transition. Retirement will affect your family, so make sure that the effect is positive.